Batchelor Advice on Love, Sex, and Relationships


Q: I’ve been talking to a girl for almost a year, but I’m not feeling her as much as she’s feeling me. How do I break it off without feeling guilty?

A: The best advice is Honesty.  It will not benefit you to lead this person on, because the longer you spend with her the more unhappy you will be and it’s not worth wasting each other’s time.

Q: I’ve been with girlfriend for years but she still does not trust me; even though I’ve never cheated on her and passed up many beautiful women. How can I can her to trust me? 

A: Other than cutting off your balls and giving them to her, she probably will never trust you.  If you have never given her any reason not to trust you and she still can’t trust you then she might have trust issues.  Leave now before it’s too late and save yourself the headache of arguing every night.

Q:  If I’m suppose to chill with a girl and I text her but don’t hear back from her until hours later, and when she does reply it says something came up maybe another day.  Should I take that as a sign she didn’t really want to chill and forget about her?

A:  This can be taken two ways.  Unexcpeted things can arise without notice and monkey wrench in her plans without her intentionally dissing you.  A good way you will know if she wants to really chill she will take the initiative to make it happen another day.  If you don’t hear from her and you have to constantly reach out to her chalk it up as a loss; she is not interested and is just being nice to you.  If a woman really wants to see you nothing will stop her.

Q: If I really like a girl, but she keeps calling me bro and only considers me a friend. How can I let her know my feelings without jeopardizing our friendship?

A: If you really like this girl; the best thing to do is let her know your true feelings. The longer you wait the more difficult it will be to get out of the friend zone. Women know who they are attracted to fairly quickly, but if you win her heart you might have a chance. It’s always best to try than live with regret.

Q: I’m dating a guy for almost 3 years and he still hasn’t proposed yet.  Should I continue to wait on him? 

A: Men are not complicated creatures.  If you love him and he’s still doing all the right things in the relationship; be patient he might be working towards making it special for you.  As long as you’re both on the same page there is no timeframe on marriage.  If he’s your soulmate; he’ll make sure to put a ring on your finger.

Q:  As a woman do you think it’s okay for me to approach men, or should i wait for them to take the initiative?

A: In this new generation that we live in; there’s nothing wrong with a lady approaching a man if she’s interested. The old school way of the man courting the woman is still alive, but with women becoming more independent and financially empowered; there’s nothing wrong with you going after what you want. Most men will never turn down a woman talking to them or even asking them to go out for a drink or dinner. On the other hand it’s more likely for a woman to reject a man, so the odds are in your favor.

Q: I’m talking to a girl, but I’m not really feeling her. She introduced me to her friends and cousin, and I’m really feeling her cousin. What should I do?

A: This is a tough situation, because no matter what you do; it won’t end well for one of the parties involved. The best thing to do is end it with the girl you’re talking to and let her know it’s not going to work out. The likelihood of you ever being able to talk to the cousin is slim; especially if they’re close. With that being said; if the cousin is feeling you as well and you guys let it be known upfront.  I’ve seen crazier things happen..

Q: I’ve been talking to a guy now for almost 5 months and really enjoy his time.  When is the right time to tell a person you love them?

A: Love is a two way street. There is no time table on love. You can meet someone tomorrow and fall in love in one week. It’s all about the chemistry and the way you both feel when you’re together. It’s a feeling that you’ll have and he will show the same not by words, but by his actions.

Q: I’m extremely busy and don’t have much time to meet new people. Do you think using a dating app is a good way to find a soulmate?

A: With all the new algorithms they can produce with software, it’s an ideal way to find someone who shares the same sentiments as you. With that being said; anything you do you must always know there will be pros and cons. Dealing with someone through an app you must always try to have some form of communication visually to avoid any false pretense and always use caution when meeting.

Send questions or comments to / Subject Batchelor Advice. The content of this article under no circumstance should be considered professional advice.  Such advice may be obtained in consultation with your personal counselor.

Image photo by Giorgio Trovato (Unsplash)